Me Time

I don't want to say that I always used to think moms were lying when they talked about how hard it was to find time for themselves.  But I think there were definitely some times when I didn't quite believe them.

And now I get it.

By the time I'm headed to bed, I've had a little over an hour to myself.  And in that time I take a shower.  Pampering isn't an option.  And during the weekend?  Well, that's tricky, too.  And it's funny -- all I really want to do is paint my nails.  But that's one of those things where you can't just throw on a coat of polish and continue to go about your business.  Or at least I can't.  If you can, please let me know your secret.

So here comes that mom/wife guilt that doesn't seem to ever go away, and usually likes to sneak up on you when you're already feeling like poop.

Today is one of those days.

If I jump on the computer for some "me time" during "Jacob time" (afternoons/early evenings) I feel guilty.  Something about not devoting all my attention to that silly little boy who is growing up too fast.  I might miss something.  So I end up catching a few minutes of computer time here and there, and then I get a little more time in after my shower and before bed (about an hour).  But Erik isn't usually too happy about it because then I'm not paying attention to our tv time.  Or at least, that's how I interpret it sometimes. 

See, we have a routine to our days....
4:00pm:  Jacob and I get home.  He gets a fresh diaper, I get out of my work clothes, and then he and I have a light snack and play for a little while.  Erik usually gets home anytime between 4 and 4:30 and joins us. 
5:00pm: We (and by that I mean Erik) start thinking about or working on dinner.  I continue to try to entertain Jacob until it's time to eat.
5:15-6:00pm:  Eat dinner and clean up.  I get dishes taken care of, Erik works on packing up lunches for all three of us.
6:00pm:  Now that the weather is nice, we go for a walk, then sit outside until about 6:45 or so.  We come in, Jacob has some wind-down play time.
7:00pm:  Jacob gets a bath.  While Erik is giving him a bath, I get his bedtime milk together and take about 10 minutes to browse on the computer.
7:15pm:  I give Jacob his milk and get him to bed.  Erik takes his shower.
7:30pm:  I get my shower and head downstairs to browse a little more on the computer.
8:00pm:  Light snack and then head to the basement to watch some tv.
9:00-9:15pm:  Head upstairs to bed. (Yes, I go to bed at a ridiculously early hour, but I get up at 5am.  I'm exhausted.)

And this routine doesn't change much.  So you can see that there isn't much space in there for "me time." 

As a result, I try to do little things to make myself feel better.  I recently bought this:

Clarisonic* Mia 2: Find it here
www.clarisonic.com
 

And I love it.

I get super comfy pajamas for sleep.  My slippers are plush and fuzzy.  I use Bare Minerals* make-up and Clinique Chubby Stick* lip color.  I sometimes stop for a Dunkin Donuts* bagel.  And on weekends, when I can (but usually while Jacob naps), I go out to Target* or the mall to make a sweep and scope out what's there. 

But I hate to do it because of that mommy/wife guilt.  I feel bad leaving Erik with Jacob, knowing that while I'm out, Erik could be taking that time to work in the garage or do something around the house that he wants to get done.  So I try to rush, but then I usually end up forgetting something.  Or I try not to stay out too long, so I end up not getting everything done that I wanted to, which means I'll need to figure out when to go out again.  If I'm out for too long, I feel guilty for that.

And I end up going around in one big circle.  Which is kind of what I feel like this blog entry has done.

Moms, how do you find time for yourself?  What do you do to "pamper" yourself?

*Author Note:  I have in no way, shape, or form been compensated for endorsement on any of these products by any of these companies.